Evolve

This whole year has been one giant experimentation for me. I've finally learned to stop editing my creativity and just let myself and my imagination go. I've investigated marketing, and how it works and what effects it has on me. I've spent hours that would add into days learning to disregard everything I've learned so far so that I can look at the world - my world - through clean un-filtered eyes.

So that I can hear what's in my head, and let it come out as is - no editing.

Seems simple. Really really not. I'm envious of the people (several of which are friends of mine) who seem to have been born never questioning whether they would be able to stand on their own. Not me! God bless 'em, my family is much more conservative and I was raised being told that I could only go so far before I would either need my family or a man to take care of me.

They meant well. I have no grudge, but that was just about the worst advice you can give to an Indigo Artist. I've been working hard to un-learn that little piece of advice (along with many others) so that I could really grow and be self-dependant. So that I wouldn't have to wait on others to get where I want to be. (Did I mention that I love my therapist?)

So - I've learned a lot. I've learned that I don't fit in one single genre. I like all of them. So I'm going to write in all of them, and play in all of them. I'm even inventing some new ones. And blending others together. And I love it. (recordings coming very soon)

I'm writing performance art pieces. I'm drawing and painting and journaling. I'm involved in theater projects. Lately I've been dressing like a girl toy soldier to play the piccolo in a rock opera inspired by Burning Man. And I love it.

I've learned that there are a lot of thing that exist in the "music industry" that I really don't like at all. I don't like the distance that most artists have from their fans. I get the seclusion thing - and I go through major bouts where I don't want to really talk to anyone as well (the cocoon before the revelation - just finished one.) ... but I'd like to think that if someone writes something that inspires me, and I want to ask them about it, that I could. In some cases you can... but rarely. I don't like that musicians are often placed on top of pillars. I don't like going to concerts in arenas. I don't like art that you feel you can look at but never touch.

And I'm still figuring it out. Still having new revelations every day. Still coming to realize a lot about the world, music, art, feelings, spirituality, love, body, earth, soul... and realizing that I can re-create, re-mix and re-organize all of these things in whatever way I need to. Some days it's tough, and it feels too big and scary, but I'm enjoying seeing the world in a way I've never seen it before.

I know it's marketing 101 to have a message, and present that message clearly. I guess I've finally figured mine out:

EVOLVE

That feels right. Has a nice ring to it... :)